The Leg Lamp

Only one thing in the world could’ve dragged me away from the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window. Little Orphan Annie. -Ralphie from A Christmas Story From time to time I see the Major Award from A Christmas Story and it always makes me smile. There is something about the idea of getting an award, even one as silly and pointless as a lamp shaped like a leg, that makes the heart quicken. Of course, back in the good old days you didn’t get award for just showing up, you had to do something. The Old Man…

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Boot to The Head

Back in the good old days I used to listen to Dr Demento, which was a syndicated radio show which played songs that were often shocking bad or good. The problem was that you never knew which was which until you had already heard the song. Comedy songs have a long history, as Dr Demento often had songs from the dark ages of the 1950s and even had time to play a bit of Gilbert and Sullivan once or twice. Modern Major General was a bit of a hit in the 1879 musical The Pirates of Penzance. The odds are…

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Elf Yourself with JibJab

The good people at JibJab have teamed up with the good people at OfficeMax to fulfill everyone’s dream of becoming an Elf. Yes, Elf Yourself is back and you can make yourself into an Elf and watch your elf self dance ala JibJab style. There are four dances to choose from, Classic, Country, Disco, and Charleston. These are not long dances, but they are kind of fun. The Charleston is in beautiful sepia tone. You dance a solo in the Classic, but are accompanied by other elfs in the rest of the dances. Now if watching your Elf Self dance…

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Torture Me Elmo

I saw one of these Stretch Elmos the other day and found it a bit disturbing. First off Elmo is spread eagle and just needs a ball gag to complete his S&M look. They should have handcuffs and a whip for sale as accessories. But that just might be a dirty old man thinking bad thoughts when he looks at cute little Elmo in a submission pose. What’s more disturbing is that the point of this toy is to pull Elmo’s arms and legs and make Elmo laugh with delight. Am I the only one that thinks this is a…

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Top Ten Most Annoying Phrases

“We grow tired of anything that is repeated too often – an anecdote, a joke, a mannerism,” author Jeremy Butterfield says. “The same seems to happen with some language.” University of Oxford researchers seem to have had a bit of free time on their hands, so they consulted the Oxford University Corpus and made a list of the phrases they found the most annoying. As a blogger I tend to write without doing a lot of editing. So I tend to use some phrases more often than I should, repeat myself, and well, sometimes annoy my readers. At the end…

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Boris Karloff and The Monster Mash

“Monster Mash” is a 1962 novelty song by Bobby ‘Boris’ Pickett. Boris Karloff the man who became famous for being Frankenstein’s Monster, was the star of over 200 films according to IMDB. Such movies as The Man Who Changed His Mind and The Man They Could Not Hang are not well known today, but hey, when your an actor ten bucks is ten bucks. I always liked the Frankenstein films. I even liked the Abbott and Costello films which featured a number of monsters from Universal. Boris Karloff was one of those actors it was easy for other to make…

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SuperBowlSingleGirl-CyberBegging in The Big League

The Super Bowl hopeful — a 5-foot 6-inch, 110 lb. brunette — plans to raise the money to purchase a thirty second commercial through online gifts via PayPal as well as traditional fundraising efforts–SuperBowlSingleGirl Amy Borkowsky has had a hard time finding Mr Right, so she wants to raise three million dollar to buy an Ad in the Superbowl. The Super Bowl Single Girl website says that Amy is best know for her Amy’s Answering Machine-which I am guessing doesn’t quite pull in 3 million dollars on a regular basis. Amy Borkowsky made it onto The Today Show to make…

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Morning Banana Diet-One More Stupid Diet

Eat 1-2 bananas before each meal… minimum of 3 times a day.-Morning Banana Diet One food diets make the occasional appearance because they are easy to understand. The Morning Banana Diet is a lot like the Grapefruit diet-you aren’t eating nothing but bananas, just adding them to your diet. A similar diet involves drinking a glass of water before and after a meal-the ideal being to fill your stomach with something beside the normal junk food we all live on these days. The news on the Morning Banana Diet is that it is a craze in Japan at the moment…

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Dig This on CBS Sunday Morning

Have you ever dreamed of enlarging those sandbox toys you enjoyed as a kid? Have you ever thought it would be cool to operate an excavator, bulldozer or skid steer? Dig This is your opportunity to play in the dirt – super sized. –Dig This Bill Geist is one of the best parts of CBS Sunday Morning as he is always doing stuff that is, well, just silly. One week he bought land on the Moon. Another he learned the manly art of being a Hot Dog Vendor. This week he took that childhood joy of playing with Tonka Trucks…

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Model Rockets

Like Red Ryder BB Guns, Model Rockets are among those toys most coveted by children and most feared by parents. If shooting your eye is a concern, how about being blown up? The reality of model rockets is a bit of a let down. You get the cool little fuel pellets, put them inside a nicely painted cardboard and plastic rocket, run a little but of wire and flip a switch. Zoom goes the rocket in a nice little cloud of smoke. Then you have trudge around looking for the thing once it parachutes back down to earth. As with…

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